Moving Onward - 2021

                    

Photo by Bram Naus on Unsplash

Instead of toasting with champagne or watching the clock strike midnight around the globe, I snored the New Year in. Not that I wasn’t interested! I’ve been hoping for and anticipating 2021 since last March when the world went upside down. But when, as my dad would say, “it’s time to go to SleepyTown,” I have to give in and turn in.

But on awakening this morning I thought about The DayMaker.

I wrote no blog posts in 2020, but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t writing. In November of 2019, we lost my sister to cancer. Along with the tears and pain as 2020 began, grief poems and journal entries issued forth by the dozens. Then COVID-19 struck, and in addition to trying to navigate the new parameters and safety protocols, I began a Corona Virus Journal, recording my account of what life looked like for me during this time. And that included several poems as well.

Then the Minneapolis police killed George Floyd, and I began to work on a sheaf of poems around racial justice, equality, and ending police brutality. Along with seven other poets and writers, we put together an anthology inspired by the board-up artwork and photography of the Black Lives Matter protests from around the United States. The title of this stunningly beautiful volume is ENOUGH "Say Their Names..." Messages from Ground Zero to the WORLD. 

Paradoxically, 2020 both hustled along and crawled at a snail’s pace. Travel was curtailed and many activities closed to us, but I look back now and recall my busy-ness and many positive experiences. They begin with the self-care webinar my daughter Asila and I designed and presented several times with my other daughter Amina's assistance. There was the online writing class I began with the encouragement of the North Bend Public Library and continued on my own.

I'm wading through, reading and learning tons about American history and social justice. And, reading contemporary poets whose riveting styles and words illuminate the events of our times.

Through the technology of Zoom, a variety of classes, lectures, readings, and meetings filled my calendar and my need to be “among” people and talk about ideas and feelings. I became more familiar with meditation and learned about and practiced a deeper relaxation Yoga Nidra.

This past week, I had to figure out how to update my website, my hand forced by GoDaddy! But, it’s done and I'm feeling much more competent.

We survived a year like no other, full of challenges and sorrows, joys and blessings, learning, re-learning, and unlearning.  And while many of the stressors are still here, some of the most relentless have gone, or will soon be behind us. We have lots to look forward to and important work to do in 2021.

Starting now, as we embark on this new year,  let’s move onward, together.

~ xoA ~

Two Sides of Perfection

Perfection has a double imperative. We can strive to reach a goal or to make improvements: a recipe that we’ve developed, our health, our job skills, “a more perfect Union”. Or, we can choose to reject perfection, to be open to producing our best without limiting our focus or creativity.

Olympic athletes, with their eyes on the gold medal, practice diligently, relentlessly, to do a flawless dive, gymnastics routine, ski run, or start out of the blocks. In their minds’ eyes, athletes visualize the perfect paradigm. With work and determination, the athletes’ skills become more polished, heading toward perfection; expert judges spot it immediately. 

I like to see perfection in all things related to my medical care and financial services. Show me a perfect blood draw stick when it’s time for my lipid panel. Let my bank statements and my personal financial records be accurate to the penny. 

Often, reality falls short of our ideals. Look at the folks who spend their lives looking for the perfect mate, only to find disappointment as no one measures up to their vision. 

I’ve spent 40 years searching for the perfect Philly cheese steak sandwich. The one that tastes exactly like I remember from hurried lunch hours in Ann Arbor when I was a young traveling teacher. None has yet lived up to those that I ate and juggled while driving to my afternoon school. It’s a small disappointment but one consolation is that missing that sandwich has, no doubt, kept my cholesterol within a normal range and saved my arteries from clogging.

A few weeks ago at an Art for Healing writing session, which my friend and fellow writer Anke facilitated, I heard her say, “Deny perfection.” She was inviting us into the realm of enso poetry and continued, “Remain open to the journey.” 

"The Journey" (Taken at Yosemite)

Anke began to explain this Japanese form, but I was stuck on “deny perfection.” One glance at the faces in our circle of writers and the sounds of us shifting in our seats confirmed that I wasn’t the only apprehensive one. But with Anke’s guidance, we embraced the process. In her wisdom, our leader knew that surrendering the idea of perfection would invite images, words, thoughts, and feelings. She knew that pictures and poems would come forward because we’d opened the space for them.

"Openings" (Taken at Bryce Canyon)

 I think responding to both sides of perfection yields a balanced approach to life. Standards and ideals compel us to stretch and achieve. And, we need the freedom, happiness, and openness that letting go of perfection brings.  That way, we each maintain a balance, creating a life that is perfect for us. 

~ xoA ~