Daymaker - a person who performs acts of kindness with the intention of making the world a better place.
~ David Wagner
, author of Life as a Daymaker; how to change the world by making someone's day ~

DayMaker - any thought, word, or deed that spreads happiness, compassion, or fruitful ideas.
~ Annis Cassells ~

Thursday, December 31, 2015

Keeping Connections

On this New Year’s Eve, I am reflective. I am grateful. I have my family, my health, my friends. I am comfortable and cared for, buoyed by the many connections I have with the people in my life. These are the folks who help stir the feelings of happiness, love, and completeness in my bones. They are my mainstays.

A favorite exercise I often present in self-care workshops is “Categories of Connectedness.” It’s an excellent vehicle for bringing forth the many ways and reasons we connect with others and for recognizing those for whom we are grateful.

The act of placing the names of important folks in our lives within the categories is illuminating as we see who fulfills certain roles for us. We have our confidants, intellectual stretchers, models, mentors, health watchers, “chicken soup” folks, and fun and adventure people. Some names appear in multiple categories. Some categories may be vacant -- for now.

  • Confidants -- those whom we can tell anything in the world about us and trust our words will go nowhere
  • Intellectual Stretchers -- those whose actions, words, and deeds propel us to think and grow
  •  Models -- the folks about whom we say or think, “I want to be just like them.”
  • Mentors -- the ones who take us under their wings, guide us or pave the way for us
  •  Health watchers -- those who remind us to make our appointments for physicals or mammograms, provide us with healthy recipes and choices, or research the medications the doctor prescribed. They are also our workout buddies.
  • “Chicken Soup” folks -- the ones who we turn to in time of crisis and know we will leave them feeling all the better.
  •  Fun and Adventure souls -- those whom we count on for a laughs and excitement or new, enjoyable experiences

Who are the people you have in each category? If there are empty spots, your mission is to seek and watch and allow someone in to occupy that category.

On whose lists would your name appear? These are the folks who look to you to satisfy a much-needed role in their lives.

Each of these dear family members or friends is a reason for our being. We are gifts to each other and all in this together. Let us stay connected or reconnect in 2016 for a healthy, happy, gratitude-filled year. Make that call or write an email or a letter. Soon.

With love and gratitude for each of you and looking forward to a happy, healthy, uplifting new year,
~ xoA ~


  1. Annis,
    This is such an appropriate posting for the New Year. It really hit the spot for me as it aligns perfectly to my goals for 2016 of "cleansing my house" so to speak and this is a fabulous exercise in which I will apply to my own life. Thank you.

    1. Happy New Year, Brittany. I've found this exercise to be helpful, showing me much about my relationships. I'm delighted you can use it, too. Much love and many thanks for writing and for your friendship. xoA

  2. Annis,
    I just love this post. Although we don't make friends based on this categories, it's interesting to contemplate those who are most important in our lives and why.
    Thanks for sharing.

    1. Exactly, Joan. Thank YOU! I appreciate your comments. xoA

  3. Lovely post and I'm going to put it to use. Thank you for that, Annis, and Happy New Year!

    1. My pleasure, Kathleen, and my thanks to you. I've found this an interesting tool that encourages me to touch base with folks. It also helps me to not overload the people on my lists. xoA